Facial Fur Fever

Summer has arrived, and unless you're a die-hard baseball fan, the sports landscape is vastly different. It may even be downright boring. There is one topic, however, that easily makes any summer sizzle: facial hair. I'm using the 1990s as our starting point on this list, so as much as we all love Joe Namath's fu-manchu, you won't see it here.



Clay Zavada

Clay is included here because he's a modern Rollie Fingers. If some of Rollie's talent rubbed off on Zavada he'd be set.







George Parros

Parros is another member of Team Stache. His facial forerunner harkens back to the days of Lanny Mcdonald (see below)...Good times.







Adam Morrison
I'm not exactly sure who Morrison was trying to impress with his peachfuzz. My best guess is that it was a lucky charm from his AAU days and he was worried it could be a Samson situation if he trimmed it off.








Drew Gooden

Gooden has changed facial hair almost as many times as he's changed teams (six different teams at last count). I’m all for mixing it up, but at what point do you just grab a razor and start over?









Jon Garland

Garland has arguably the most indecisive facial hair out there. His look says "Yeah, I'm sporting this look for my man-card, but I'm not too sure where it's headed."









Kimbo Slice

One word: fear. Any guy that would show himself on national television with such hair growth is downright scary.










Scott Spiezio

Spiezio gets points here for the color coordination, but as far as team spirit goes, aren't there more manly things? Like kittens and bunnies..







Scott Pollard

Over the years Scott Pollard has been well-known among NBA fans for his sense of humor, but braiding your goatee with rubber bands? What’s that thought process like?








Alexi Lalas

With apologies to Rick Sutcliffe, Lalas may have a more legitimate claim to the “Red Baron” moniker. Lalas sported the prototypical soccer player/rock n’ roller look, and it didn’t hurt that he was good at both his sport (US soccer icon) and his music (his band once opened for Hootie & the Blowfish).








Rasheed Wallace

Before Kimbo slice, there was Rasheed Wallace. Rasheed may have been using his gruff for a more practical reason: storage. There was always something hangin' out in the beard.





Ryan Franklin

One major prerequisite to being a closer: gruesome facial hair. Franklin's look can't be for the ladies...it looks like a few newborn chicks could nest in there with ease.






Michael Phelps

Phelps was the story of the year in 2008, winning an amazing eight gold medals at the Bejing Olympics. Coming back stateside brought a new set of problems (and questionable choices caught on camera), but he used comfort facial hair as opposed to a comfort food to cure what ailed him. Now if only disco made a comeback..







Mike Commodore


Commodore is the obligatory NHL playoff beard pick. If you're going to grow the afro, you might as well match it with a killer peice of facial fur right?







Lanny McDonald

He falls out of the timeline requirement, but any discussion of facial hair in sports has to include Lanny to be true to form.